If you go to the Smoke House restaurant on Ferry Road in Christchurch, New Zealand, where the food is cooked by a genius but priced by a tax accountant, there’s a wall with a blackboard and customers write things like these:
My wife ran off with my best friend. God, I miss him so much….
What other people think of you is none of your business.
You can work hard for good money or you can work hard for no money. Your choice.
Fake is the new real.
Famous to myself.
Parachute for sale: never opened / used once / small stain.
Insanity is hereditary. You get it from your kids.
I am an excellent house keeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.
What do you do if you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
I’m in my own little world. They all know me in here.
Getting older beats the alternative.
‘Normal’ is a setting on the washing machine.