Posts Tagged ‘aliens’

What Have We Became?

Sunday, September 13th, 2009

40 years since Woodstock. And from the Moon Landing. Are we so much more controlled by the corporate robots that we can’t exceed or at least equal our human achievements and our sense of joy from the 60s?

We grounded the Concorde and replaced it with nothing. We are grounding the Space Shuttle and replace it with obsolete, no-return craft.

In the West we are fatter than ever and junk food operators post record profits during recession. Most of Africa remains below poverty. In Congo children dig uranium ore with their bare hands.

In some countries kids can start a gay relationship at sixteen with funding from the government but can’t buy a beer for their dad until they are eighteen.

Jews overtly kill Muslims, Muslims openly kill Christians, Christians have just stopped killing Jews.

Ex-communist billionaire oligarchs buy and sell nuclear stuff to dictators of empty-stomach republics.

The only true war in the last four decades should have been the Falkland/Malvine one. Ugly enough this one, too.

Some corporate CEOs earn more than a rock star and pretty much all big CEOs earn more than the number one tennis player. However, in Africa, Asia and Oceania people who live half the years others live in the West earn less in a month than the equivalent of my dog’s daily breakfast. (Mind you: I don’t really work but I have two big dogs.)

40 years after Woodstock, less people live in a house they own. The annual income of any of the top 100 corporate is bigger than the GDP of almost any country on this planet, with the exception of the few where big businesses are based.

Relax: our robots are getting better and better day by day.

The Mockocast

Monday, August 31st, 2009

Soon our best mockoposts will be adapted for the Internet and mockocasted! (This be voice you can listen to if you can’t be bothered reading or if you just can’t.) No, at first there will be no pictures; just use your imagination. (That be the top half of your IQ.)

A team of webmasters, sound engineers, voice-over artists and some radio personalities, togehter with a few notorious bloggers, a bunch of ex-international journalists and many other equally important folk, one of them making a cup of tea, are working as we speak to insure that the mockocasts will be produced can be released soon. The very first episode will only be launched as a collectible edition!

In the future the mockoteam will present interviews with celebs incognito and even live mockocasts from our IP studios, but one step at a time!

Step one: mobile fone in hand or eyes on your PC screen! Step two: stay tuned! Step three: just stay there a bit longer, yes, slightly to the right! That’s it!

The Worst Website Ever – swapid.com

Wednesday, August 26th, 2009

During my random searches on the Net (mostly looking for robots) I came across the most ridiculous website. Web page, I should say, as it is not a website (yet?), or maybe I should call it web document as it’s not really a page; or not even a document, it’s just a web text.

I wanted to print screen copy it and post it here but it’s not worth the hassle. Just go have a look at swapid.com – what an exaggerate load of crap!

Let’s swap our ID !!! Let’s have an ID-swapping party 🙂

Or maybe swapid is a verb, like: “I’ll swapid you tonight, baby!” or maybe  “Swapida la vista!” Sick stuff, really!

I asked our friends from Google to show me photos of ID swapping and this is what they came up with at  number 1 across the web:

A POKEMON!!!

This the Pokemon

There’s a better one later down the search results:

Pokemon_Types

This one bellow is a great picture, as it’s not even a picture but has a lot to do with the swaps.

id-swap-m

My favourite on this search is a more sophisticated one (I have enlarged it for a better view as it was just tiny like a miniature work of art on the Net):

wow speedy art

I don’t know what you make of this, but to me it is full of drama and it really tells a long story in one shaky frame. It says: “I’m the frustrated boy racer with a frustratingly slow car, that does ZERO miles per hour at ZERO rpm but some of my other systems work!”

However, nothing can beat the greatest idiotic web proposition ever: swapid.com – I reserve for you the pleasure to get it straight from the horse’s mouth. It only takes one minute if you have a slow connection and it requires about half a neuron to comprehend what’s there and how useless it is!

He Who Owns You

Friday, August 21st, 2009

H1great fun not mine

H12 cemetery fake

What is life? Who runs this business? (Don’t look for excuses, you atheist prick! This mockopost is not about God!) What’s your Exo-IQ?

How would you feel waking up floating above your death bed with the sudden realisation that now you are in possession of the final truth? What if this truth were that all your life was spent serving as a nameless slave amidst million of nameless slaves? It doesn’t sound like fun, does it?

H2 lord-byron-on-his-death-bed

Yet, just like they say in those endless infomercials, “But wait! There is more!”:

H3 infomercial

Imagine that not only you’re well dead and yet aware of this  scary new state of vertigo, but you’re also a non-believer in life after life. As much as you might be floating freely in an out of body experience, you are actually in a very tight spot. This is not the right  place and this is not the best timing to receiving more bad news.

H4 outofbody

Guess what!? ” This special offer doesn’t end here!”

H5 - pandoras box wow

It becomes clear to you that you only had a single go at the Earthly human life, hence the realisation you’ve just screwed it! Just another bloody slave!

H6 Slave-Chain-Thanks Great Pic

“Order now and get the full benefit of this one-off deal!”

H7 - deal religious stuff

The worse part is not only that you wasted it all, but you also served and died anonymously for a master who’s grace, compassion, beauty, mana and IQ do not exceed those of a broken light bulb’s.

____________

Disclaimer

1. Pictures courtesy to the mighty Internet.

2. Wanna know now, while still inside this life, who The Master is? Do you think he or it is your bank? your health? your lover? your God? your username on the Mockoblog?

____________

“This is the last chance to take advantage of this amazing deal! Only one full bonus package left ant it MUST go to the first caller!”

H8 - not my pic

H9 - i didnt do it

Mate, if you really want to find out who owns you, stay tunned to the mockoposts. Your Exo-IQ won’t drop.