MockoBlog MockoLog #3
This must be one of the most frequently used opening lines in a blog entry: “Nothing worth mentioning has happened since my last post.”
But isn’t this the quintessence of human life? What did you expect to happen to you? Be ran over by a tram? Win the jackpot? Paint The Last Supper? Thanks God, you’re not only alive, but you also had a boringly normal and routinly common time. I bet you also had toast and butter for breakfast and there were only two emails in your inbox, one of them from your Ex.
It is true that out there, in the wide open world, some guys are really busy with less ordinary stuff. It seems that all’s happening to them. The North Koreans launched two missiles today. That’s just after testing an atomic bomb the other day. I bet they don’t read this blog and I guess they don’t even write one. They are busy putting the bomb and the rocket together, just have to figure out which one better fits inside the other. Any idea?
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The other email I got was from my old mate Tim. What do you mean Tim who? Tim is the guy that doesn’t exist, yet sends emails. It’s a Platonic dialogue, though.
Tim says: ‘stop whinging, your blog s..ks’. That means he’s not reading it, which means I can publish his stuff without his knowledge and/or consent. But should I be doing him a favour? Perhaps I should, since Mother Nature hasn’t.
(I managed to upload Fritz’s famous travels in New Zealand. See Tim – A Tribute.)
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How can you say nothing is worth mentioning?
Life is so, so tasty! Let me give you an example:
1. think of mashed potatoes, quite a sizable serving on a large dark coloured platter
2. think of letting some bits only half mashed
3. add more milk then butter, olive oil is OK, but not much
4. then build a mountain on your plate, more like a volcano, with a large cone in the middle
5. sprinkle pepper (you’d already salted the potatoes when boiling) and chopped spring onion (i’d use scissors)
6. no, not like that!
7. randomly!
8. yes, let the little green rings fall all over
9. think if it’s worth topping the volcano with a generous spoon of cottage cheese
10. stick a parsley leaf in the middle (a wee branch of dill will also do)
11. cover the edges of the platter with parmigiano/parmesan
12. set aside a pint of dark ale for later
13. thirteen is a bloody unlucky number (don’t ask me why, ’cause it’s never been for me)